Naisip ko lang, tayong mga Pinoys really have a hard time saying No.
In our efforts to be ‘nice’, we actually come off wishy-washy and insincere.
One prime example is ignoring messages on Facebook from people who are asking us for something–anything. If only we knew that a prompt and honest answer would actually complicate our lives less!
I have learned that if you can’t go to an event, can’t do a friend/family a favor, or you simply wish to decline an offer or request, a polite and prompt NO should be sufficient for anyone. You don’t even have to give a reason; it is no one’s business but yours.
Pag na-offend or nagalit sayo yung taong tinanggihan eh problema niya iyon.
Seriously, we really don’t have to say yes to every request for our time, resources, and attention. Repeat after me: YOU ARE ALLOWED TO SAY NO. And no, you don’t need to give a reason. Unless you want to.
Don’t stress! We’ve all got things going on, and a good friend/relative will understand, they won’t have a sense of entitlement to your time, money and efforts.
So friends, instead of letting a message sit on your inbox for days and weeks on end, just respond in a timely manner, and decline if you wish to decline.
Do not be all “Oh, I’m not sure, I’ll check”. Or an insincere “Wow, I’d really like to go, but I’m not sure with work and blah-blah-blah” and then proceed to ghost the inviter/asker.
Honestly, I personally think that a soft no is even more rude than a hard “No” because you give the impression to the other person that you are still thinking and checking and so they will keep waiting on you. You also put unnecessary pressure on yourself to come up with an excuse or a plausible reason. Most ng mga ladies they throw their husbands/BFs under the bus:
“Oh, my husband had to work so we couldn’t come.”
We know you have lives, you are busy. Just politely decline if you can’t (or won’t) go and move on.